It Runs in the Family

Judah is my snuggly, happy, giggly baby:) One of my favourite things to do with him is nurse. He is even cuter it seems when he's nursing. He always smiles up at me and sighs, and he has to be holding my hand or touching my face. And his little, chubby top leg is always moving. It's so funny to see---he'll have it straight up in the air, then his foot is on my face, then he's kicking it, I just find it so amusing:) Kallie was a very still nurser, so this is really different:)

One of the things he's been doing lately is so funny to me. Some background--since Lyndon and I first started dating, when he holds my hands, he tends to play with my fingernails. He rubs his finger tips along them, puts his nail under mine (is this weird to share?:) and it drives me CRAZY! He rarely does it anymore, but it's taken me about 7 years to get him to stop---he just did it out of habit:) When Kallie was about 18 months, she started doing the same thing. Whenever we're snuggling or watching cartoons together, if she's holding my hand, she's playing with my fingernails. I've gently tried to get her to stop (it really does bother me) but she still does it occasionally. So NOW, guess which little 8 month old has joined the family tradition? Instead of just holding my hand now, he plays with my thumbnail:) What is it with these Wagenaars and my fingernails:)? Or is it the driving me crazy part they enjoy?;p

I have no idea why all 3 of them do it, but it brings a smile to my face to think of my 3 loves, instinctually doing something (even as annoying and miniscule as it is:) all the same:)

Being a Mom

Being a mom is the best thing ever. EVER. I just can't believe how much I love my munchkins. Having small children is exhausting, time consuming and completely self-sacrificing. It is also the most worthwhile, rewarding, fun, meaningful, incredible thing I've even had the privilege to be a part of. Kallie and Judah are such complete joys, I just can't get over it:) Here are a few things that I just am crazy for in my kids:

Kallie

-is super affectionate, loves to give hugs and kisses and shower us with 'I love you's
-is a complete and utter goofball. I thought all kids were this silly, but through different experiences and other parents' comments, I'm really starting to see that this goofiness is a big part of her personality, which is unique to her.
-is so independent. I'm always so proud of how well behaved Kallie is and how well she does on her own. I can trust her to do so many things on her own, and it is really awesome to see her develop those skills.
-is a genius:) Ok, so that may be a biased mama's opinion, but she definitely is a smart little cookie:) She has a memory like a steel trap, and right now she's really focused on learning her letters. It's summer and she's 3, so I'm not really jumping all over it, but from the relaxed conversations about letters that we have, she knows about 10 of them, can write about 5 and loves to explore what words start with which letters.

Judah
-is the happiest baby there has ever been:) And this is no bias---ask anyone who's spent time with him. My sweet boy constantly giggles and laughs, shrieks with joy and smiles, just because. He can be by himself in a room, with no toys (good mom, huh?:) and just be giggling:)
-is a snuggle bug. Almost every who picks him up gets a nice little snuggle---he buries his face in your neck, wraps is arm around your shoulder, and just rests there:)
-is friendly. He has never, ever made strange, and he's 7 1/2 months now. Kallie started making strange at 6 months, and he just never has. He loves people, and is his happiest when he has someone to 'talk' with:)
-has found his voice. He completely shrieks and babbles SO loudly, it's pretty funny. He's been really silent until now, so it's a shock to hear him so vocal!
-is busy! He is at a stage where if anything is within arms reach, he's grabbing/pushing/pulling/eating it:)

This post is mostly for me...I don't want to forget this stuff, so thanks for bearing with me:) One of my favourite things about being a mom, is getting to spend time with other moms and see how much we adore our kids:) I think it's so special that God created us with this amazing love for our children, that no one else is capable of feeling for them:)

Our Little Peanut...

is allergic to peanuts:(

About 6 weeks ago, Kallie put her peanut butter sandwich on Judah's forehead (gotta love 3 year olds:) and he got three big welts in about 2 minutes. The next day, he got some pb on his cheek from the daycare kids, and his face and neck were covered in welts in about 2 minutes again. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach, an overwhelming sadness, as I came to my own conclusion.

We were referred to a pediatritian and had allergy testing done. Result? Judah has a 'very significant allergy to peanuts'. This means that he's most likely anaphalactic and although 20% of children can outgrow a peanut allergy, the more severe the allergy, the less likely that is. Since birth Judah has had extremely senstive skin and eczema. He frequently breaks out in rashes and although it's been really great having him start solids, b/c of how sensitive he is and knowing he has 1definite allergy, it's also been very stressful.

Right now all we can do is control Judah's environment...we can't have him around any peanut products, and people cannot eat or touch peanut products and then handle/kiss him. We need to start making the drastic changes to completely de-peanut our house (meaning every product that 'may contain peanuts' or were made 'in a plant that contains peanuts' is gonzo). This includes things you'd never think of, like Bath and Body Works products and other household items. I'm so overwhelmed by it. For the most part I push it to the back of my mind, but every now and then, I let my mind jump ahead a few years, to the worry, the responsibility, and to Judah's experience...and it makes me cry. And panic.

I'm very aware that in the big picture, when I know people who have lost children and who can't have children, this is no big deal. I'm thankful, so so thankful for my beautiful boy. But right now, this is our big deal. And it feels tough.

My Six Month Old

Ok, I don't want to blog anymore. At all. But I know I really should. I don't want to forget all of this. And I find when I'm putting something off, the best way to get over it...is to just do it. SO, here goes.

Judah is 6 months already! I can't believe it, I really don't feel like that much time has gone by or that he could possibly be that old! Here are 10 bits of info about my adorable baby boy:

1. Judah is the happiest, calmest, smiliest, giggliest baby in the world! I've never encountered a baby like him:) He has a smile for anyone who will make eye contact with him, and the number one question we get when out in public is, 'Is he always this happy?!?' And the answer is YES! Unless he's way past a meal time or hours past when he should have slept, he's happy. Even when he's overtired, he's happy:) He is such a joy, and I just can't get enough of his little belly laugh, which I get to hear at least 20 time a day:)

2. He's huge:) He's in 12-18 month clothing, and weighs over 20 lbs! I think he's going to be built like his daddy...

3. Judah is a decent sleeper. He's way better than Kallie ever was, but he's still up at least once a night (sometimes 2-3 times) which someone just reminded me isn't actually all that great for 6 months;) It's ok though, he's been exclusively breastfed up until this week, so I think that solids will help him sleep through the night. I mean really, he's the size of a 1 year old:) He needs more food!

4. Judah is not vaccinated. This isn't really a 'Judah' fact, but it's something I want to record. We vaccinated Kallie on the regular schedule, but have decided to wait until after a year to vaccinate Judah. It's been a different experience not having a dr's appt. every 2 months.

5. He has extremely sensitive skin. He has rashes that come and go, as well as eczema. We have to be very careful about what touches his skin.

6. He's almost sitting up on his own. I think it might still be awhile before we can let him sit without us close by to catch him, but he's getting there;)

7. He loves being on his tummy. Anytime I put him on his back, he almost immediately flips to his belly, and this includes sleeping. It freaks me out a bit---ever since he learned to roll, he's never slept on his back. I don't really know what to do, I can't get him to stop, so for now I'm just checking on him lots:)

8. He loves Kallie more than anyone else! He is completely fascinated with her and just can't get enough. Every time I get him out of his crib, I can barely get him to look at me b/c he's searching for her. As soon as he hears her voice, his eyes light up and he starts to squirm with excitement:)

9. Judah loves playing with toys. He can grab everything, and loves to explore with his hands. He also loves taking his soother in and out of his mouth.

10. He's half snuggle bug, and half mr. independent. If he ever fusses, you just have to put him down and he'll be content. But when he's sleepy, he wants nothing more than to nuzzle right in, and has been known to wrap his little arms around the neck of whoever is holding him and rest his head on their shoulder:)

So there you go, a post finished! Of course, sans pictures, but I've decided that FB gets all of my pics, so occasionally I'll add some here, but if we wait for pictures, it'll be a lot longer before a post happens!;)

Getting back into it...

So, it's been awhile, and when it's been awhile, I always feel really overwhelmed with everything I haven't been blogging about and don't know where to start. SO, I thought I'd start with me:) I found this on another blog, and thought I'd give it a try. It was fun, and maybe, just maybe, will get me blogging again (see things I fear for the real reason I need to get doing this!!!)

I am...
a follower of Christ
a wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend
very happy with my life
working on becoming a person I didn't think I could be
athletic
learning to be patient

I love...
God
my husband
my children
my friends
chocolate chips:)
Starbucks frappucinos:)

I don't like...
housework
ignorance
insecurity
narcissism
listening to my babies (or any babies, really) cry:(

I am looking forward to...
having more babies:)
two trips this year to see family and friends
seeing my children as adults, being a part of their lives and loving on my grandbabies:)
heaven
being at a healthy weight again

I wish...
losing weight were easier;)
I was more creative in some way
more people cared about issues in our world that need our action to make a change

I hope...
when my children look back, amongst all my flaws they will truly see who I was/am as a mom, and be happy that I'm their mama:)
Lyndon and I get to be great-grandparents


I fear...
losing my children
not doing with my life what I am called to
not documenting our lives well enough, and the memories being lost
what others think of me

I pray...
My children will choose to be followers of Christ
I will get to be with all of my family one day in Heaven
Lyndon and I are building a family and home that glorify God
I am the mom I need to be to help my children become who God created them to be
I show love to each person I meet

3 months? WHAT?!?!?

ok, it's no secret that I am horribly inconsistent when it comes to blogging. In fact, are there any of you actually reading this right now? I doubt it. Anyways, as bad as I am...I had no idea it had been 3 months! Honestly, I can't really say where these last 3 months have gone in any aspect of my life, they have raced by without me noticing. I'd really like to start blogging more, like I said, I want to document everything...so, for those of you who still sporadically check, thanks for doing so, and hopefully there'll be something new and fun to read soon:)!

My Sweet Kallie

So, I said I was going to post funny things Kallie said, and haven't been doing a very good job! Tonight, she gave me the chance to record two new ones, so here goes:)

(I posted this one on facebook...too cute to pass up!)
'Mom!' 'What Kallie?' As she held my face in her hands (squishing my cheeks a bit) and stared lovingly into my eyes, 'You have chubby little cheekers just like Judah and me!!!' She thought this was hilarious!

Lyndon was at worship band practice at church tonight, so just Kallie and I got Judah ready for bed. After we put his jammies on, I asked her if she wanted to pray for Judah too tonight. She said yes, so after I finished praying, I then said a short prayer that she repeated one line at a time. After I prayed, 'Lord, please bless Judah as he sleeps tonight' she said it, paused, and then said, 'Ok Jesus? Ok?' . It was so funny, she was making sure He was going to do it;) And then on her own, 'and protect him and keep him safe Jesus. In Jesus' name, AMEN!!' And then as I put him down in the crib, 'mom, can you pray over me now?' Oh, how I love you sweet, sweet girl.

Our boring (but wonderful:) life

I haven't updated in awhile because, well, I don't really have much to update on. Things have been quite laid back, and a tad bit boring around here lately. The kids are both doing great, Kallie is as sweet and funny as ever:) She's had a fun couple of weeks, going swimming with her Oma, having a sleep-over at Oma and Opa's, and we've had a couple of parties (birthday and Valentine's) at daycare. She did have the stomach flu last weekend, but has completely recovered:) Judah is growing, eating, and sleeping like a dream:)! He's already given us a couple of 7 hour stretches, and consistently does 4-5 hour stretches at night. A couple of weeks ago he had his days and nights mixed up, so I started waking him up and nursing him more during the day (upon the advice from my lactation consultant and from my best friend) and it worked like a charm! He doesn't sleep any longer than 2 hours during the day, but when we put him to bed between 7-8 pm, he does his first long stretch for the night. He already puts himself to sleep, which is miraculous to me, b/c things were so much harder with Kallie. I think it's a combination of knowing SO much more about babies and their sleep needs this time around, and him just being a great sleeper! Whatever the reasons, I'm just thankful, b/c with a daycare to run, I'd be losing my mind otherwise! He is an incredibly happy, sweet, bubbly little baby:) He loves cooing, smiling HUGE and giggling:) Sigh, it just makes me so happy I feel like my heart could burst! Kallie loves making Judah smile, and she literally squeals when she makes him laugh, which again, makes my heart feel like it's going to explode:)

Kallie has been having a bit of trouble with her sleep lately, she's been having nightmares:( It's really sad, she wakes up hysterical in the middle of the night. We always bring her into bed with us because we really want her to feel secure and safe. It only happens 1-2 nights a week, but for her to be scared like that, it's a lot! We've been praying over her and about it, but any other suggestions from parents who have had kids with nightmares, would be appreciated! It's pretty cozy in our bed those nights, especially b/c I nurse Judah lying down in our bed...quite the feat cramming all four of us in there:) We co-slept with Kallie for quite awhile (she just moved into her big girl bed in November) and I have to admit, both Lyndon and I enjoy snuggling with her some nights again:)

Things have been slowing down a bit for Lyndon workwise, so we've had a lot more time together as a family, which has been great! I've been feeling a little less overwhelmed lately, and making my 'Six List' every day is REALLY helping me! I get it done every day, and so feel productive every day, but not overwhelmed or out of control! I still have quite a few moments where I look around the house and realize all that needs to be done (and then panic a little bit), but I just talk myself down from there...I have to be able to just not care about some things in order to enjoy life! And making it a priority to have one-on-one time with Kallie every day really helps too, I tend to have a hard time just living in the present...I'm always thinking ten steps ahead about what I need to get done, but when I'm with her, I'm able to just *be* there, because that's the most important thing I could possibly be doing:)

We have a fun month coming up, the first week of March, one of my best friends from college, Kat, is coming to visit us from Calgary! She's staying for a whole week, and I can't wait! And at the end of the month my mom is coming for a visit, and then we're all driving to Winnipeg for Easter. I can't wait to spend time with my family and see my wonderful friends. No one there has met Judah yet, so it'll be fun! AND I get to meet my good friend Kelly's beautiful baby girl, Ava, when we're home! She and Judah are just a bit over a month apart:) Congratulations Kelly and Bryan!!!:)

Hope everyone is doing well, I'm so excited for this weekend, not too much happening, but we're having lots of time together as a family, and I have a couple of playdates lined up too, so it should be fun!!!

Look At Me, Two Posts in One Week:p

Well, bet you didn't think I'd be back so soon! This week has been a really challenging one for me. I feel like everything kind of piled up, projects or things I had pushed to the back of my mind all reared their ugly heads, and every way I turned I was behind, inadequate, or struggling. (wow, that was a long sentence) I was dealing with issues about myself, and issues about our life, feeling as though I'm never 'caught up' or where I want us to be. And in the midst of it all, I just don't think we're getting enough time together as a family. So how do we do it? How do we work to support our family, keep our house running day to day with things like laundry, cleaning, cooking, etc. , do the extra projects around the house like organizing, taxes, renovating, cleaning out, etc. , spend time with our friends, spend time by ourselves enriching our lives doing things we're passionate about, spend time relaxing so we don't go crazy, and most importantly, spend time together as a family, either doing fun things, or just 'being'. I'm serious, HOW DO WE DO IT!?!?! I feel like the transition to two kids has been easy. I honestly do. I think running a daycare really helped, and Judah is an extremely content, sleepy little guy. But somehow, this last month has been the absolute busiest of our lives, and I feel like we're just spinning in circles, and at this point we're running on empty. So I'm putting the question out there: How do YOU do it? I know that we're a common case, young working family, with tons on the go, never enough hours in the day. So what do you do to stay sane and ahead of the game? I'm really working on figuring this out, prioritizing, and being more efficient with our time. One thing I've started doing is a 'six most important things' list every day. I list the top six things I HAVE to get done in a day, and carry over anything I don't get to. I love lists, and it really helps me feel like I'm being productive each day. And as cheesy as it is, #1 on my list each day is play with/hug/cuddle/kiss/read to my kids. I find between running the daycare and everything I have to get done around the house, that oh-so-important one on one time with my munchkins (especially Kallie) can get overlooked. So I'm doing a list, and hoping it makes a difference! We'll see!

Ok, enough of the complaining. I had a fantastic Friday/Saturday! My friend Laura, who I've known since I was 12 or 13 came to visit:) She lives in Duluth MN, which is about 3 1/2 hours away. It's so amazing for us, being two military kids who met when we lived in Europe, and who are from different countries, that now as adults we live so close to each other! When you're a military kid, it's a rare blessing to be able to spend any amount of time with childhood friends because you usually end up in completely different cities, if not countries:) We're going to go down next month to spend the weekend with their family. We had a great girls night last night (stayed up until past 2 talking) and had a relaxing day together just hanging out and, what else, talking:) It was wonderful! Thank you so much for coming up Laura, we will see you SOON:)!

I've decided I want to start recording the funny things Kallie says on the blog. I always say I'm going to write them down, but I don't. So this will be the place:)

I don't have any coming to mind right now, but look for short blog posts in the future, just with funny things she's said:) This is my way of committing myself to doing it:)!

And to finish this (kinda random) post off, enjoy some pictures of our little munchkins:)

Keeping Up

Wow, my goal is to stay consistent...so far, not doing so well! Where does the time go? Judah is almost 7 weeks old already, and we're into February!!! Last week was our last midwife appointment. The midwives provide 6 weeks of postpartum care, which was really amazing! It was definitely a bit sad to be saying good-bye, they've been taking care of us for almost an entire year! Our baby boy is doing wonderfully! He's growing like crazy, 13.25 lbs and 25 inches long at 6 weeks! Yes, he's huge:) He really does look like a 3 month old, and actually, he just outgrew all of his 3 month sleepers! He's above the 90th percentile for weight and above the 95th for length. Kallie was really high in her percentiles too, until about 4-5 months, when she dropped to below 50. She was completely healthy, her growing just slowed down:) I wonder if that will happen with Judah...Kallie has turned out to be on the taller side, but certainly not as big as I would have expected our children to be:p Maybe because Judah is a boy he'll be bigger...we'll see:) He is SUCH a great baby! He's completely content all of the time. He starts to grumble a bit when he's hungry, and he'll squawk a bit if I go a few minutes past when he should be sleeping, but those are two easy fixes:) He's sleeping really well, I've started putting him down awake (swaddled, soother in), and he falls to sleep on his own! I'm ecstatic about this! Sleeping was a nightmare with Kallie, and it's already going so much better with Judah!

Life has been really busy, Lyndon has been working a lot and we've just had a lot on the go, but things are settling down a bit now. We have finished renovating our basement, which was the biggest time consumer this month. I'll post pictures once it is all set up. Sometimes I wish we could win the lottery, not for all the money or stuff, but just so that we could not work, and spend WAY more time together. My absolute favourite part of the day is supper and the hour or two after, when we just spend time together as a family:) I love being a mom and a wife so much!

Kallie is such a little character, I can't get over how grown up she seems! I was just looking at pictures from when she was one, and can't believe how much of a baby she still was then, and how now she is all little girl! Most of our evenings are spent being entertained by her stories, singing and dancing. One of her new favourite things to do: 'Mom, dad, I'm going to sing a song, and then you can clap, and then I'll say Thank you! Thank you!' What a little goofball:) We're so proud of her, she's such an amazing big sister, she just loves Judah so much and is always trying to help. She is very kind-hearted and compassionate, and I love watching her with her friends. She's also extremely strong-willed, and we have definitely been dealing with a lot of defiance the last few months. I hope and pray as parents we're handling everything the best way possible, but admittedly, sometimes it takes me to a point of frustration that I wish I hadn't gone! Parenting is such an amazing, difficult, rewarding, joyful journey, right now everyday brings something totally new!

I've decided not to post pictures with every post, b/c if I make that commitment to myself, then I will post A LOT less! And really, I want to make sure I record this journey so I don't forget it all!

Judah Benjamin

Hello Everyone!!!

Well, one of my resolutions this year is to try and blog more consistently. I was pretty consistent (by my standards) when Kallie was a baby, and I want to be that way with two kids now, b/c I am horrible at documenting/organizing pictures etc. so this is my 'scrapbook' so to say:)

As you all know, our beautiful baby boy, Judah Benjamin joined our family on December 16th. He is one month old today! I can't believe a month has gone by already, but in other ways, it feels like he's been with us a lot longer! I think because so much has happened since he's been born (Christmas, my family has come and gone, New Year's, starting daycare again) that it feels like he should be older...not to mention that he's the size of a 3 month old:) I had a midwife appt. Thursday, and he weighs 12 lbs 7.5 oz! His 3 month sleepers are starting to get snug...I'm guessing they'll last another week:)



I want to share how this last month has been, from the 'birth story' up to having a one-month-old. It's been a pretty amazing month, so far nothing has been too hard, although sleep deprivation is just starting to catch up with me:)

The Birth Story (might be TMI for some:)

I went off of work (I run a home daycare) the last Friday in November, because my due date was Dec. 6th, and I was hoping beyond hope that I would go early, or at least on time this time:) When my due date came and went, and then two days later I had an exam with my midwife to see if we could do a 'stretch and sweep' and she told me that my cervix was COMPLETELY closed, I was devastated! I so, so badly didn't want to be induced with this labour (I was with Kallie, and it was awful). Because I had midwives, I could have gone a lot longer than last time before I would get induced, but the because of the circumstances of this pregnancy (Christmas, family coming, opening the daycare at beginning of Jan.) I didn't want to go that far overdue. I was really stressed out about trying to figure out if I would be induced or just wait. But my prayer my whole pregnancy had been that I would go into labour naturally, and although I really wanted to give God a timeline, I kept praying 'natural and whenever is YOUR timing'. So I discussed with my midwives an induction date, and we originally set one for Tues. the 15th (one week after the initial exam). The rest of that week I thought about it more and more, and b/c I had another 'stretch and sweep' scheduled for the Monday (14th) I decided to bump my induction date back to the 17th. I went in on Monday, and finally I was dilated and 50% effaced! I had a stretch and sweep that day, and then came back first thing Tuesday morning for another, more aggressive, one. I spent the day with my friend Sheena, we ran errands, hung out, and everything felt totally normal.

At around 6:30, I had my first extremely mild contraction. Lyndon, Kallie and I were all home, just spending a quiet evening together. For the next 2 1/2 hours, I kept having contractions, quite sporadic and mild. We put Kallie to bed at her normal time, and by 9:00 she was still wide awake, singing and playing in her bed. I didn't want to call Lyndon's parents to come get her right away, b/c I'd never gone into labour naturally before, and wasn't sure if we were a few hours or 24 hours away from giving birth. Just after 9:00 though, I knew my contractions were strong enough and close enough together that no matter how far the baby was away from actually being born, we'd be heading to the hospital tonight! I was SO excited that I was going into labour naturally, and so thankful to God that I had felt prompted to push back the induction date!!! So we called Lyndon's mom, she came and got Kallie, and as Kallie was leaving I had my first intense contraction! (perfect timing...a child should never see their parent going through that!) At that point my contractions started coming 3-6 minutes apart, so we paged the midwife. She told us to come into the hospital to be examined, and we got there around 10:30. She examined me, and I was already 5cm and the contractions were coming really fast (every 2-3 minutes). Between 10:30pm and 1:12 am I was in agony and went a little bit crazy:) I know it was a very fast labour, but it was awful (just like every woman's labour, I'm assuming:) The worst part was that Judah was posterior (a sunny side up baby as my midwife referred to him) which caused two things to happend: 1. I had the urge to push from about 11:00 on, but had to fight that urge b/c I wasn't ready, it was just the pressure his positioning caused and 2. From about 11:30 on, I didn't have a break between contractions. After each contraction, the pain only mildly subsided, but it still felt like I was having a contraction, which was horrible. Lyndon and I had a good laugh the next morning, because I was saying some pretty crazy things:)

For those of you who know me well, you know that I am all about natural childbirth. I want absolutely nothing to do with a c-section, epidural, or major drugs (just to be clear, I have no feelings about other people's childbirth choices, those are just my preferences). WELL...I was BEGGING for all of the above:)! Yep, even a c-section:) The midwives brought me demoral and gravol (at which point I yelled, 'WHAT IS GRAVOL SUPPOSED TO DO?!?!?' I was a real treat;), but I knew and they knew that I really didn't want demoral. I felt so sad at that point, b/c I wanted pain relief so badly, but I just kept thinking and saying, 'I don't want to drug my baby, I don't want to make my baby drowsy, etc.'. I kept coming close to throwing up, so the midwife gave me gravol intravenously. It made SUCH a difference, I can't believe it! It didn't do anything to manage the pain, but up until that point, I had been gagging, almost hyperventilating, screaming and yelling (my throat was sore and my voice hoarse the next day...it was that crazy!) and thrashing around. I was expending so much energy on all that, that everyone was afraid I wouldn't have enough energy to push the baby out. The gravol completely calmed me down, and for about the last hour, even though I was completely aware that it was just as painful, I went into kind of a trance, and just lied still and moaned. Lyndon said I became a completely different person and they couldn't even talk to me I was just so focused. I was so thankful I had midwives who knew I really didn't want drugs, respected that, and helped me move past it. Throughout my whole labour I kept apologizing to them, because I was aware of how crazy I was being, but I just couldn't stop.

When I started pushing, I got pretty hysterical again (at one point I yelled at my midwife, 'GET HIM OUT NOW!!! IF YOU CAN SEE HIS HEAD, JUST REACH IN AND PULL HIM OUT!!!):). And I must have moved around quite a bit, because I also smoked Lyndon in the face (he was forgiving;) AND accidentally ripped my IV out...not a pretty site! But thankfully, I only had to push through about 6 contractions, and he was here;)!!!



It was THE BEST FEELING ever to know that I finally had my sweet baby boy, was not pregnant anymore, and labour was over!!! Lyndon's mom came to the hospital and gave Judah his first bath (she's a maternal/newborn nurse, and was able to do the same with Kallie), and she and Lyndon left around 3:30. I tried to get some sleep (not easy after labour, especially when you just want to snuggle your little baby:), and then Lyndon came back around 9am. We were hoping to leave right away, but the midwife ended up in a labour, so we finally got discharged at around 1pm. 12 hours after giving birth, we were home and settled in (one of the many amazing things about having a midwife!) Lyndon was so, so sweet, and just kept telling everyone how amazing I did:) I felt pretty embarrassed about how I had acted, and finally said to him I thought it was nice that he was making me sound better than I actually was. He turned to me and said, 'You pushed out an over 10 lb. posterior baby completely naturally...you really did do amazing!' It was so nice to hear:) He was completely lucid and had to deal with my craziness, and was still proud of me, I love my husband:)

This past month has been a whirlwind! Kallie came home from Oma and Opa's that same afternoon, and was SO SO excited to meet her baby brother! She definitely knew that she was coming home to the baby being OUT of mommy's belly, and it was one of the best moments of my life seeing the two of them together for the first time, and seeing how thrilled she was:) That has continued ever since, the highlight of her day is seeing Judah, spending time with him, and giving him hugs and kisses:) She always tells him she loves him, and helps mommy with him lots!:) There are definite pros and cons to all different age gaps between siblings, and her awareness level and interaction with Judah is definitely a pro for the age gap we have (not to mention mommy's sanity...this is just the right amount of time apart for ME:)!



We had a great week at home as a family, and then my parents and sister arrived to celebrate Christmas with us! It was SO SO wonderful having them all here and they just loved seeing Kallie and Judah. It was nice that Kallie had so much attention over the holidays (from both sets of grandparents and her auntie) while we were just settling in with Judah. He was so big when he was born, he nursed all the time for the first couple of weeks, which was a bit hard on Kallie. So to have my family here was a huge help! And of course, my parents did so much around the house and took care of us really well!

I started daycare again on January 4th, and so far, it's been great! I had help every day the first week, which was completely necessary and I don't know what I would've done otherwise! This week I had a bit less help (it'll keep decreasing over the next couple of weeks) and I really am doing ok:) Judah is sleeping lots during the day, and I have really great kids (who are all Kallie's age or older) so that makes things pretty easy.

Judah is such a wonderful little baby:) He's a great eater (obviously) and has made nursing really easy. He's sleeping a lot, but whenever he is awake, he's completely content. He started smiling about a week ago, and it's so much fun! He's really smiley, and has started cooing and making the cutest little noises when he smiles with a big open mouth:) I love having a little boy:) He's a very touchy baby, and LOVES to be snuggled all the time. He's very alert and aware, and will crane his neck and move his eyes in the direction he hears noise coming from. He loves to look at light, and will fight sleep like crazy if there's light to look at:)

Lyndon and I both love being parents so much, and it's just so incredible to have two kids now, and one of each! It definitely feels different this time around, but I'm not sure if it's because I have a boy, or it's because he's my second child. One thing I'm finding is that it's way easier this time! I didn't really have a hard time with Kallie, but at around 4-5 weeks with her I still wasn't going out or doing much, but with Judah, I went Boxing Day shopping (for the first time in my life!) when he was 10 days old:) And I've started going to the gym already, and also started Weight Watchers (lots of baby weight to lose this time!). I especially love being out and about with both my little munchkins, I'm such a proud mama:)!

Thanks so much for everyone's support and congratulations...my pregnancy is finally over, and it was more than worth it!!! I already know I want another one:) Just not right away...;)